29 April 1899
THE BARRACKS
CALGARY N.W.T. [NORTH WEST TERRITORIES?]
CANADA
April 29th 1899
My dearest Katie
You never wrote a letter which did me more good, or made
me happier, than the one I received this morning. And I will
tell you why. Since I last heard from you we have had very
severe weather; & the papers told me it was bad in the old
country also. This made me very anxious about how you would
get through the winter & spring; I don't thank [think?] there
was a day I did not think of this. But now I know you are all
right & gaining in strength everything seems bright with "Old
Scally". I can thoroughly understand how you feel the loss of
the Rev. [Reverend?] Mr. Irwin. He must have a lot of
personal worth; & I like him for his helpfulness to you. As
things are at home, his absence will cause you a great blank:
& little woman I am truly sorry for you. You have not, or
ever will weary me with your troubles. It is pride I feel
that you put so much trust in me. No one else would. But you
must cheer up: and tho' [though?] I know beyond all doubt,
you are not of the changeable or forgetful kind, yet bear in
mind
"Never a tear bediws [bedews?] the eye,
That time & patience may not dry:
Never a lip is curved with pain
That cant [can't?] be kissed into smiles again"
As to the new friends he will make, I misjudge the man if he
will find any nicer than you. I see plainly your life is no
path of roses: but you are brave & cheerful & good to live it
all down, & the future's pleasure will be all the sweeter,
by the thought you earned them.
Look here young woman, when you tuck yourself into bed, just
go to sleep so sound, that you will have no dreams. Anyone
who would do that about me must have indigestion. I cant
[can't?] imagine any other explanation! Katie dear I will never
misunderstand what you say to me. You have honoured me with
your confidence: and I am very proud, for its a novel role
for me to have: But I know you: & never fear dearest that I
will put a wrong meaning on anything you write to me. Your
letters are very charming for they are fresh and frank. I
feel when reading them, that I have got one real friend that
puts some faith in me: & your doing so gives me a help, I
often need. I have been so much alone out on the prairies
#PAGE 2
here, that nice people dont [don't?] come my way: and so you
have been put on a pedestal: & like our savage ancestors I do
a little of the "bow down" to your loving goodness.
It's nice to hear that my letters are welcome & that they
make things a week (sic) bit bright. And now Katie I want you
to stop saying anything about your not answering me sooner.
Indeed dear I know truly how hard it is to get time for
everything. Of you I have had no uneasiness save for your
health: and I think so highly of you, I could not think you
might have written, even if a long time went by. Never let it
into that little nut of yours that I could think anything
about "trampling". My sincere affection & devotion goes to
you without hope of reward: & if you never answered this
letter, & no word came from you again, I'd [I would?] go on
to the end without a shadow of a belittling thought of you
dear. Now you know I am not laughing at you, when I praise
you, for you are too much to me. But you always did a bit of
Teasing, a game I am going to cultivate. I had intended to
say some extra nice things I think about you, but will keep
them stored up, till such times as you stop "frivolling". I
will write at once to John, tho' [though?] I have not heard
from him for a long time. But in his position I expect he
gets quite enough pen work. He will hear the Ballintoy news.
I am sorry about [---t.?] & the cause. You know I feel for
anyone that is in that way. And I have tried to help those in
trouble out here. Look here, if you ever talk again about me
ever having been the possessor of nice eyes or nice anything
else, I will go through this world with the idea that your
mind is affected!! And that would be a nice state of things,
considering you are all I have to think of or care for.
So be careful.
The time I got snow blind I was 25 miles from Barracks, & if
my horse had not known the way home, this letter would not
have been written. I did not know I was in the Barrack yard
till they lifted me off & brought me to my room. The "Pig" is
in great form. I have got him a ball which I throw for him,
when he wants it, which is very often. The main road to the
town runs along side the Guard Room, with only a wire fence
between: & passers by must be highly edified by the spectacle
of an eldery [elderly?] party, and a small brown dog, playing
in the evenings. I am continuing this on the 30th: and as I
write a blizzard is raging. Bitter cold & the snow whirling
& drifting The supply of coal has given out & our ever
thoughtful officers won't buy any more: as they have plenty
for themselves; the result is we have no fires in the
Quarters, & spend very cold nights, with all the clothes we
have piled on our cots. I laugh, & the rest get mad at me. The
#PAGE 3
ruin of this Force is the officers. Theirs are all political
appointments and as a rule they come from a lower class than
the rank & file. As an almost universal rule, we are better
educated: & knowing this they annoy us as much as they can It
has been war with me since I joined: & I am unchristian
enough to rather like it! Yes Stevenson & I get on well: and
I do like him. In fact we all pull fairly well together. I
hold my end up, & being the strongest Sergt [Sergeant?] in
the mess, come out all right!! You get the photo: & I will
see after the frame: as to fear of facing the Camera - young
woman you are fishing for compliments & I refuse to be hooked
into giving any!
It's easy to write & tell me not to trouble about your
health. But I have to do it: so there now! Let the answering
of this letter be as long as you like: but one thing is
certain dear your letter will be welcomed, come when it may.
I am glad you think it is nice of me to say you are my all.
Thinking so wont [won't?] harm either of us, & having you
in my thoughts that way, will help me be a better man, & pull
me through some tight places I come across. Yes I had quite a
lot to do with Mullett, you were thoughtful to send me the
paper. But when are you not? You little goose, why all the
lotions that were ever made, won't keep our mosquitoes away.
But you get used to them. The young blood of lads fresh from
the old country they are after: and as I am not in that class,
I escape fairly well. It is but little I can say darling about
your home life: but I feel & am sorry you are so sorely
tried. But you will come out of it all I know, for I have
faith in you. They say the Ball was a success: but as usual I
did not go. This day week I went to a family in Town for a
couple of hours. He is a solicitor named Nolan & his wife &
child are nice. These are the only ones I know in Calgary &
the last time I made a call was 18 months ago! So you will
please take note that Scally has not developed into a Society
Butterfly! Your ship will come, beyond all doubt: & my share
of the enjoyment will be delight at your good fortune. You
are a very determined little person: and still insist that we
will meet. Give that up dear. The chances are so small, I
dont [don't?] want you to nurse a thought & get
disappointed. In you [your?] wisdom you say love is blind,
like the Scotchman "I hae ma doots"!! [I have my doubts!!?]
As an old solider [soldier?] I have learnt implicit obedience
to those in command, so, a couple of hours after I got it,
the little picture was mounted on card board & hung at the
head of my cot; by the original thread that came with it.
Tomorrow summer routine commences & Reveille goes 1/2 an hour
earlier. This means I have to be up, dressed, bed made, kit
#PAGE 4
folded & down at the Guard Room to take over at 5.30 in the
morning and I am not off duty till 6.30 in the evening. Well
I dont [don't?] grumble. Works [work is?] good for a man. I
eat & sleep well & I have the best little woman in the world
for a friend. And he would be very high up that I would change
with!
Goodbye darling. Best love & may
health, wealth & happiness be yours
is ever the prayer of
your affectionate friend
Ernest Cochrane
